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“You are not a failure until you start blaming others for your mistakes”

"You are not a failure until you start blaming others for your mistakes. »

Related: Why You Should Always Give Credit and Take Blame

This maxim of coach John Wooden was the cornerstone of his approach to life. As with many of his principles, he learned it from his father, Joshua.
In his book My Personal Record with Steve Jamison, Coach described how his father reacted when he lost his farm:
“The end came suddenly. A bad vaccination serum killed the pigs, the drought slowed down the harvests and the bank took over the farm. At that time, there was no insurance for this kind of problem, so we lost everything. It was a very difficult time for our family and the Great Depression had not even started.
“Through it all, Dad never winced. He didn't blame the shopkeeper who sold him the wrong serum, didn't curse the weather, and held no hatred towards the banker. My father had done his best, but things had gone wrong. "Blaming, cursing, hating doesn't help you," he said. " That hurts you. His example is deeply ingrained in my mind and hopefully reflected in my behavior. ”
The idea of ​​not blaming others for our own mistakes was also central to Coach Wooden's approach to teaching and coaching.
The former UCLA star and of the NBA, Swen Nater, coached at Christian Heritage College in El Cajon, Calif., and was a little frustrated because the players weren't taking in what he was teaching fast enough. When Swen brought the situation to Coach Wooden's attention, Coach simply advised Swen:You only taught after you learned.
Part of this led to You didn't teach until they had Learned:Teaching Principles and Practices of John Wooden by Swen Nater and Ronald Gallimore. In this book, Coach commented on teacher responsibility:
“When I became a high school teacher, I took my responsibility very seriously. I believe I was paid to teach, and that meant it was my responsibility to help each of my students learn. I think it is impossible to claim that you have taught when there are students who have not learned. »
As a leader, you need to work with those you supervise to solve core problems and resolve them, instead of blaming the team and complaining about the lack of talent to work with.
When you blame others, you prevent yourself from doing proper self-evaluation, which is essential for self-improvement. The leader who does not blame others has his office in the solutions department , not the apology department .
In his book Bois on Leadership along with Steve Jamison, Coach summed it up this way:
"You can stumble and fall, make mistakes and mistakes, but you're not a failure until you blame others, including fate , for your results. Always believe that there is a positive in the negative. Things usually happen for a reason, even when you can't discern the reason. Remember, "There is a special providence even in the fall of a sparrow. » »

Related: The importance of constant self-improvement